my blog

ok everyone. i have been going thru some not so good stuff lately. but good news, IT'S ALL BETTER NOW! everyone just needs to stop worrying about me.

i am home now and looking for a job and am considering online schooling. i had a few depressing days last week, but i promise, i'm back to my usual happy self.

i know i shouldve updated this sooner, but i havent really had a chance to. so here i am. this isnt going to be a long post, it's mainly a post to clear things up.

my mom is getting tired of getting emails and calls from people that are concerned about me. and honestly, so am i. i appreciate and understand the concern, but i need to say it once again, everything is fine. i am not hurting myself, i am not suicidal. i am happy!

my mom has asked me to delete my older postings on here, and i cant do that. i am sort of a pack rat, where i feel the need to save everything. i have every email i ever recieved saved into organized folders, even if they are just store newsletters or postmaster delievery failure emails. i still have them all saved. it's the same on here. i cant bring myself to delete old posts. my old posts on here, though they may not all be happy and pleasant, are still a part of me and i shouldnt have to delete anything that explains how i was feeling on a particular day.

i havent lied on here at all, and every single time i made a post i wrote exactly what i was feeling. i was expressing myself. i see nothing wrong with that. i realize that some of the things i wrote are a cause for concern, but i dont necessarily feel ashamed for it or see a need to delete it. it's a part of me.

this blog is my online journal. i understand that journals are usually a private matter, but this is public and anyone that wants to read it can. i am fully aware of this. one of the reasons i have this journal as public is because i tend to write about certain situations or events that occurred that are significant to me, whether they are good or bad. if someone asks me what's up or how i'm doing, or if someone asks me about something that happened, it's much easier to just point them in the direction of my blog. then they can read about it, and ask me further questions if needed. it's kinda a convenience thing.

ive said it before and ill say it again, i am fine now! there is no more need to contact my mother with concerns or anything like that. i am happy and loving life.